Photo courtesy of www.unicornlady.net
Cosmo Declares November 4th “International Don’t Fake It Day”
A recent poll from Cosmopolitan Magazine revealed that 86% of its readers have faked an orgasm. We can’t say that we’re terribly surprised. There are plenty of reasons why a woman might fake an orgasm, in fact, it’s been scientifically studied.
Scientists Gayle Brewer of the University of Central Lancashire and Colin Hendrie of the University of Leeds conducted a study about vocalizations during sex. The study revealed that, while female orgasms were most common during foreplay, the women made orgasm-like vocalizations most often before and during male orgasms. In other words, we tend to make those ooohs, ahhhs and YES’s not because we’re about to climax, but because we want him to.
Now, while there’s nothing wrong with coaxing an orgasm out of your partner, verbally or otherwise, it’s important not to short-change yourself along the way. Studies show that 33-50% of women experience orgasm infrequently and are dissatisfied with how often they reach it.* Faking an orgasm sends the inaccurate message to your partner that they’re doing something that’s pleasurable (or rather, positively orgasmic) for you when in fact they aren’t. This false-positive reinforcement breaks down the communication that’s critical to any sexually satisfying relationship.
The more that women (and their partners) learn about their bodies and what makes them feel good, the more likely those women are to have sexually satisfying relationships. Further, the more we talk about a stumbling block like “faking it”, the closer we’ll be to fixing it. That’s why 19 editions of Cosmo from around the world have teamed up to declare today, November 4th, Cosmo’s International Don’t Fake It Day. The magazine asks that you “stop pretending and actually have the climax you deserve… or at least fess up to your guy why it’s been happening so you can work on a solution together.” Sign their pledge and agree to join the (honest) fun.
If you’re looking for some assistance in keeping it real, check out our tips on how to introduce a vibrator into your relationship. Oh, and if you’re wondering why we chose the unicorn image, it’s because they fake their orgasms too. Thought you should know.
*Orgasmic Dysfunction, Medline Plus Medical Encyclopedia, September 2002